


Terrible Kisser

by moonlight_jukebox



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Gen, Just sappy sap, M/M, Tooth Rotting Fluff, gender neutral reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:13:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26701975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonlight_jukebox/pseuds/moonlight_jukebox
Summary: Reader has finally dumped their terrible boyfriend and the entire BAU is delighted. During a “celebration” of Reader’s breakup, they confesses a fear to Dr. Spencer Reid.
Relationships: Spencer Reid & Reader, Spencer Reid/Gender Neutral Character, Spencer Reid/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 133





	Terrible Kisser

When I joined the BAU 2 years ago, I had expected to work with some of the best minds in the world, but I quickly found out that they were also some of the best people in the world. They had welcomed me into their little family with open arms. 

Another thing I learned is that family is there for you, no matter what, even when you're not sure you want them to be.

To the extreme delight of the _entire_ BAU, I had finally broken up with my boyfriend of 16 months.

Either the entire team was very good at hiding their disdain for him or I was a very shitty profiler because I had no idea how much they disliked him.

“Oh, that dude was a fucking clown,” Derek Morgan had said.

“Yeah, he was a complete narcissist,” Emily Prentiss had chimed in.

“I don’t know what you saw in him,” Jennifer Jareau had all but shouted.

Penelope Garcia had a whole host of complaints that she was not shy about telling everyone, at the highest volume possible.

“He wasn’t even very nice to you. Remember when we had dinner at Rossi’s and you had to _leave_ because he was being such a bag of dicks? Not even a good bag of dicks. He was a bag of diseased dicks."

Aaron Hotchner and David Rossi were much quieter with their support of the end of my relationship. Rossi had just clapped me on the shoulder while Hotch shot me a smile when I broke the news.

All of this was right before Garcia declared that we had to go out to the bar to celebrate "Y/n finally leaving that asshole!" When I had put up a protest she had said, "well, we can think of it as a funeral too. If you need to mourn. But you are GOING."

That was the end of the discussion.

I wasn't upset that my friends drug me out to the bar. I wasn't even upset that my relationship had ended. I was upset that everyone seemed to see how wrong he was for me…except me.

Not wanting my mood to affect the rest of the team, I had parked myself in one of the booths along the back wall of the bar. I stared sullenly at my drink while the rest of the team had fun without me.

“You look like you’re having a great time,” a voice teased from beside me, drawing me out of my pity party.

I turned my head to see the smiling face of my favorite genius. “Hey, Spence!” I greeted, gesturing for him to take the seat beside me. “I thought you went home.”

He just shook his head. “Bars aren’t really my thing, but Garcia would kill me if I tried to leave early. So, I have just tried to hang back as much as possible.”

“I know the feeling.” Because I did. “This isn’t how I normally deal with the end of a breakup.”

Spencer took a drink from his glass, which I suspected contained only water. “How do you normally do it?”

I scrunched my nose at him. “Usually I watch cheesy romcoms and eat takeout,” I said, grinning when he laughed. “What about you?”

He looked confused. “What about me?”

“How do you deal with breakups?” I clarified.

He chuckled before he turned his gaze away from mine. “It’s not a problem I have very often.”

"I don't buy that," I mused, nudging his shoulder with my own. "But I really appreciate you coming out to this…celebration?" I laughed; I really had no idea what this gathering at the bar down the street from FBI headquarters was.

“You’re not…sad you’re not with him anymore, are you?”

I considered his question, chewing on my bottom lip. "Not really. I'm sad that I spent so much time trying to grow something that didn't pan out. Usually, I can see the silver lining of bad situations, but I don't think anything good came out of this. I got all the bad stuff."

His brows knit together. “What kind of bad stuff?” he asked hesitantly.

"Oh, nothing like that," I explained, waving my hand in the air. "It's just…silly stuff."

Spencer looked at me expectantly. “…Like what?”

I huffed and blamed the drink I had earlier in the night for why I told him the truth. "Okay, I mean, the sex was bad. But I've had tons of bad sex before; it's not a big deal." 

“It sounds like a big deal,” he mumbled.

“I’m more upset that I spent 16 months with a bad kisser!”

My genius looked thoroughly confused. “You’re not upset that you spent 16 months with a man who was bad in bed…you’re upset that you spent all that time with a bad kisser?”

I nodded, laughing slightly. “I love kissing. Sex can always go one way or the other, you know? Kissing is different.” I rested my chin in my palm. “Now the next time I kiss someone it’s going to be terrible because I probably forgot how to do it.”

Spencer’s index finger traced the rim of his glass as he thought. “How was he a bad kisser?”

“I don’t know how to explain it, Spence!” I groaned. “He just…it was a lot of little kisses and then his tongue just sort of…flopped in my mouth and it wasn’t…it was weird.”

“I see,” he muttered. “I mean, I don’t see, but I think I understand what you mean.”

I turned in my seat again, my left leg coming up to fold onto the bench in the space between us. “I can always show you,” I teased, wiggling my eyebrows.

“Okay.”

I was still laughing at how funny I was so his response really threw me. “Wait, what?”

“I said ‘okay,’” he repeated.

“You want me to give you a _bad_ kiss?”

He nodded. “Think of it as an experiment. I’m collecting data on kissing. I mean…I might be a bad kisser and not know it. What if his…methods were the same as mine.”

My gaze dropped to his lips. “I highly doubt that,” I mumbled.

“You don’t have to-“ he began, but my hand came up to cup the side of his face, causing him to freeze.

“No, I want to.” I moved my body closer to his leaning in slightly. “Just to clarify, this is going to be bad.”

Spencer just gave me a little smile. “Probably not as bad as you think.”

Summoning all my courage, I closed the distance between us and planted a peck square in the center of his lips. Then another. And another. My mouth stayed tightly shut the entire time.

I pulled away when I felt Spencer start shaking; I opened my eyes to see him silently _laughing_. Once my mouth was further away from his he started laughing in earnest. “That…that was something,” he said between chuckles. "I'm sure some people kiss like that, but not adults."

I threw my hands in the air. “I _told_ you!” I felt such a sense of vindication. “Now imagine being with that for 16 months! What if that’s how I kiss now?”

Spencer’s eyes were bright as they ran over my face. “I don’t think so. It’s probably like riding a bicycle.”

My nose twitched and my lips turned down into a frown. "I never learned how to ride a bicycle."

He _had_ got his laughter under control until my confession, after which he promptly lost it again.

“It’s not funny,” I said, poking him in the side.

“It’s not,” he agreed, trying to compose himself once again. “You’re just…”

“Just what?”

“You’re adorable.”

I could feel a blush flood my cheeks. I couldn’t believe _I_ was blushing because Spencer Reid paid me a compliment. “You’re not so bad yourself, Doc.” I smiled at him again. “Thanks for letting me give you a terrible kiss.”

“It wasn’t as terrible as it could have been.”

I looked at him incredulously. “ _How?”_

He just shrugged trying to look nonchalant, but I saw that the tips of his ears were pink. “The kiss was with you. That instantly makes it better.”

I felt something inside of my chest expand at his words. How had I spent so long with a man who just tore me down when men like Spencer Reid were in the world?

“Spence?” I whispered. “Will you kiss me?”

His eyes went wide. “Like a real kiss?”

I nodded. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

Slowly, slowly, slowly, his hands came up to cradle my jaw. His thumb brushed over the apple of my cheek while his eyes searched mine. “I want to,” he breathed out as he closed the distance between us.

I had _never_ been more mad at myself than I was the moment his lips touched mine. I could have been having kisses like _this_ the whole time?!

Spencer's lips brushed over mine softly while one of those beautiful hands moved to the nape of my neck. His tongue ran against the seam of my mouth, seeking entrance. My lips parted for him without any conscious thought from me. He pulled me closer to him as his tongue slicked over mine, causing me to moan into his mouth. His teeth caught my bottom lip, tugging gently when we broke apart.

We were both panting. I brought my hand to my face to run over my lips because they were still tingling. Spencer rested his forehead against mine while he tried to slow his breathing.

“Do you need time to get over your breakup before I ask you out?” he whispered.

I couldn’t have stopped the smile that pulled my lips up even if I had wanted to. “Definitely not.”


End file.
